Wonder Woman vs. Maude? That Epic Swimsuit Fight on ‘Battle of the Network Stars’

Gerry Strauss August 3, 12:42 pm

Robert Hegyes, Gabe Kaplan, Penny Marshall, Mark Spitz, Hal Linden, Lynda Carter, John Schuck, Richard Hatch appearing on the ABC tv special 'Battle of the Network Stars II'. (Photo by American Broadcasting Companies via Getty Images) — From left to right: Robert Hegyes, Gabe Kaplan, Penny Marshall, Mark Spitz, Hal Linden, Lynda Carter, John Schuck and Richard Hatch (American Broadcasting Companies via Getty Images)

TV programmers and producers have tried to revive Battle of the Network Stars using reality TV stars and former NFL players. They’ve attempted to relaunch it on niche networks like ESPN and Bravo. They’ve tried to reinvent it as summer programming, designed to give us something to watch until the Fall TV season kicks in.

However, no matter what they’ve tried, the magic that was Battle of the Network Stars has never been re-created.

From 1976 through 1988, the TV-watching world would gather a couple of times a year to witness their favorite stars from the three biggest networks — ABC, CBS and NBC — do battle in a variety of sporting events and athletic competitions. It was grand, it was amazing, and — to be honest — it was a little weird (but always entertaining!). From the fashion and hairstyles to the non-PC language, this phenomenon was also an amazing snapshot of TV, and society in general, during that era.

Credit: TV Guide Magazine, Nov. 13-19, 1976

The show’s very first episode in 1976 certainly got people talking, thanks in no small part to the all-star teams assembled for the competition. ABC’s squad boasted ’70s heavyweights like Farrah Fawcett-Majors, Hal Linden and Penny Marshall, while CBS brought out their own big guns like Jimmie Walker, Loretta Swit and Mackenzie Phillips. NBC countered with primetime sensations Tim Matheson, Melissa Sue Anderson and Demond Wilson.

From the very start, fans didn’t just flock to Battle of the Network Stars to watch their favorite celebrities do battle. Rather, they flocked to Battle of the Network Stars to watch their favorite celebrities do battle in water! This was largely thanks to the iconic swimming competition between Wonder Woman star Lynda Carter and Maude’s Adrienne Barbeau, who both sported skintight swimsuits that almost appeared to be painted on rather than worn. Like magazine pinups come to life, Carter and Barbeau won the attention of many a fast-beating heart that day regardless of the competition results.

Then the real show began: A controversial finish to a relay race led to absolute bedlam when Gemini Man star Ben Murphy illegally jumped the gun by starting his leg of the race early, giving Team NBC an unfair advantage. After a colorful display of ethnic slurs and spirited bickering, the matter was eventually settled by an impromptu race between NBC captain Robert Conrad and ABC captain Gabe Kaplan (star of Welcome Back, Kotter) while CBS captain Telly Savalas looked on (while smoking, no less!).

In the end, the diminutive Kaplan scorched tough-guy Conrad to score a win for his network (and, more importantly, funny underdogs everywhere). Conrad’s ego may never have recovered, but the popularity of Battle of the Network Stars was off and running, providing many years of entertainment to come, until its final episode in 1988.